You’ve Got to Have Friends

There’s nothing worse than being the weak link in a tag team.

Seriously.

As you will undoubtedly remember, my debut match for BGEast was a tag match on Masked Mayhem 2, where I joined my bud Maxx Thunder in the ring to take on two big, beautiful studs, Drew Russell and Alexi Adamov.

I never really thought I’d enjoy a tag match, but with Maxx at my back and those two beautiful men in their skimpy baby blue bikinis on the other side of the ring…I could feel my cock stirring in my trunks and the desire to see those handsome hunks suffer rising in my loins.

If you’ve seen the match, you’ll also know that I was the weak link in Team Thunder, only insofar as Alexi caught me off guard at one point–never get cocky, no matter how easy the match has seemed so far–and put me through the ringer, even tagging big Drew Russell in to add to my humiliations. He eventually got me to submit, too, the big bitch.

Team Thunder eventually triumphed, beating the crap out of the two big pretty boys.

I still regret not getting a ring match with Alexi, just the two of us–I still remember the great joy he took in torturing me when had the chance, and while there was definitely some payback in that match, I’ve always wondered how a singles match with the two of us would turn out.

Well, not really. I would have handed Alexi his ass, like I did Drew when we got into the ring for a singles match. It’s more that I’m disappointed that the fans didn’t get a chance to see me handling Alexi by myself, playing his body like a drum.

It would have been a classic.

I never did another tag match for BGEast–although I came close a couple of times. That’s another regret of mine; it would have been awesome to team up with, say, the Enforcer and take on a team like Patrick Donovan and Mitch Colby.

And I found myself enjoying watching tag matches–like Brute Baynard & Matt Thrasher taking on Morgan Cruise and Damien Rush on Tag Team Torture 19.

(to be continued)

Small Packages

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So, before I get back to talking about my match with Cole Cassidy, let’s spend some time appreciating him, shall we?

Despite the way his charisma and personality make him seem larger than life on camera–and in pictures–he’s shorter than I am: 5’8 and weighs 166 pounds. Despite the small stature, let me assure you in all my years as a fan, I never noticed his size.

He always loomed large to me.

Maybe it’s the viciousness? Or did giving up size to his opponents turn him vicious? Some mysteries will never be solved.

I am sure no small part of his presence has to do with the extraordinary vascularity of his impressive musculature. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone before (outside of bodybuilding competitions) with such exceptional size and defined so perfectly. Look at the veins roadmapping his quads, his lower abs, arms and shoulders.

Fuck me.

I would literally have to work out every day and exist solely on protein shakes for a year to get that cut and vascular.

The sunglasses are a nice touch, and even when he smiles…you never completely relax…

Plus, he does the evil cowboy look perfectly, and that’s a button for me.

He often surrenders size to his opponents–Mitch Colby, Powergunz, Alexi Adamov and Drew Russell all come to mind, out of the scores of people he’s beaten the shit out of for BGEast–but the advantage you’d think this would give his opponents is negligible.

He can cut an opponent down to size pretty fucking fast.

As I said, before I met and got into the ring with him, he was kind of an idol of mine. He still is–I still enjoy watching him cut some arrogant muscleboy off at the knees and making them whimper and plead for mercy–and after wrestling him, I admired him even more.

TO BE CONTINUED

Big Boy Beatdown

I ain’t gonna lie–I love guys that are bigger than me. I don’t know what that’s about (and to be fair–I also find guys my size or smaller hot, too), but I’ve always been drawn to big guys. I guess I’ve always had a fantasy about someone taking control of me, dominating me, and fucking me senseless.

Drew Russell is one sexy dude, and he was a lot bigger than me. 6’4 and about 220 pounds to my 5’11 185 pounds. But having already wrestled him in the tag match, I knew our one-on-one rematch would be a beat down. Big time. I also got to wear this outfit:

I was in pretty good shape at the time, too.

Poor Drew didn’t stand a chance.

The thing about wrestling someone with that much size on you is…well, you have to be aggressive. You have to take the fight to them, and never give them a chance to let them use their size against you. Because if you let them, you’re done…and once they’ve got you down, you might not ever come back.

So, I may have took him by surprise a little bit. But hey, if you’re not prepared for everything, that’s on you.

Seriously, expect anything and everything.

And once I had the upper hand on him…with a couple of exceptions, I never let it go.

I also took those stupid blue squares off him–he looked better in the pink bikini anyway–and choked him with him.

It was hot. Someone had done that to me in a private match–taken my trunks off, rubbed them all over my face, and then choked me with them, and it was so amazingly hot, and dominating. Having your own ball sweat rubbed on your face is a lot more humiliating than having you foe rub his crotch on your face. Choking him with his own trunks turned me on, to be honest…his body was already turning me on…and while the match wasn’t supposed to have any erotic elements in it..I couldn’t help exploring his body a bit with my hands when I got the chance. I sucked a bit on his nipples a couple of times.

He didn’t mind.

His pecs were a great target.

He did get me into a head scissors at one point, clamping those thick thighs around my head and making me smell the man-musk of his sweaty crotch. It was fine…I like being head scissored; it’s a big turn on for me.

Turn about, though, is fair play.

He also got me into a brutal bear hug later–but I like being bear hugged. Again, know your opponent if you want to beat him, and don’t apply holds he enjoys being in.

Drew was a hot guy. He got put through the ringer–besides me and the tag match, he also  got in the ring with Cole Cassidy. Maybe that’s why he didn’t do more matches for BGEast.

Ah, well.

The above match is on Jobberpalooza 10, if you want to see how it all played out.

Tagging

Growing up, tag teams matches were always fun to watch. I loved the idea of double-teaming a helpless opponent, the way some teams seemed to work together seamlessly, and it was always a fantasy of mine to do a tag match. I never had the chance to do so privately; finding a single opponent is hard enough without trying to coordinate a match involving three other people. Hell, even coordinating a tag match for the cameras isn’t easy; I did at least one planned tag match that devolved because someone didn’t show up–pity the poor opponent who took on me and my partner alone.

But that’s a tale for another time.

I flew down to Fort Lauderdale for a taping at the BGEast Southern compound the day after Thanksgiving. I wasn’t sure it was wise getting in front of the cameras after spending the previous day stuffing myself on my mother’s cooking, but you don’t say no when the Boss summons you. I was also a bit excited because this would be my first taping wearing the mask.

In other words, becoming the heel I was meant to be.

In all honesty, I never saw myself as a heel; but the Boss saw me in a picture wearing a mask as a joke and reinvented me on the spot. It was this picture, I believe:

The whole outfit was meant to be just funny, really; another wrestler had given me the trunks and when I showed them to one of my buddies, he pulled out the mask and gloves and we took a set of pictures. I sent one to the Boss as a joke…and thus the masked heel was born.

I wasn’t sure who was on the roster for me to tape with that weekend, but I met my buddy Maxx Thunder at the airport.

I was pretty thrilled to find out I was going to meet–and wrestle–Alexi that weekend.

When I met him I was surprised. He was a lot bigger than I’d thought. For some reason, I thought he was maybe my height and weight, if not smaller. I was WRONG, by a long shot. He was 6’4 and was in a bulking phase, so was weighing in around 220. I am 5’11, and at the time was maybe 185 on a heavy day.

And his tag partner, Drew Russell, was about the same size.

I was the runt in the ring.

This match was a lot of fun, and I had been right about Alexi–he had mad ring skills, was tough, and JFC, was he ever strong. Maxx and I were having a great time beating them down when Alexi pulled the rug out from under me–literally–slamming to the mat back-first…and then kept working over my back.

Hey, I’m freakishly flexible, but even I have limits.

And for someone who got his ass kicked a lot, he sure liked to taunt and humiliate me.

I eventually submitted to the bastard. In the next go round, I had to go back and meet him in the ring again, and once again…it looked like I was a goner until my buddy Maxx, like a true partner, came to my rescue.

And all was right with the world again.

I’ve always regretted not having a one-on-one fight with Sexy Alexi.